if I say I want.

It's ringing.
Why the lag, you may ask. It's because I hid them. I thought I could hide them well, suppress them and pretend it's fine, it's alright.
But guess what, it could no longer contain.
burst, and I am shattered now.

when I finally wake up, I come to realise I am alone.
when I was asleep, I heard your voice. so why do you have to leave when I am finally awake.
now it isn't the same without your assuring voice.

I thought some people said "it's not too late, it's never too late"? why do you show that it's otherwise. I wasn't taught how to handle heartache, wasn't taught how to cherish, wasn't thought how to handle stuff.

I had my lesson learnt.
But so what. It's too late. There's no retest available.
As you grow, you see things in a different way when you meet different people, experience different things in life. Sometimes, you may regret not giving it a try. Sometimes, you may wonder what would have happen if you did. But all you can do is just wonder and ponder because it's over and gone.

And at times, you don't know what you really want.
When you know it, it might not be there anymore.
Lesson learnt: time don't wait for you.

And you begin to generate it into your head. sometimes, even doubting what had happened.
Whether if they did happened or are they just part of your hallucination, you cannot differentiate them at times. It's hard, it's heart-wrenching but yes, you got to try to differentiate. Though you may never get an answer. So continue doubting and guessing because you're on your own and nobody will care. Or at least, the person you wish that he/she care about you, won't care. You become a passerby in his/her life.

You can say "move on". It's easier to speak than to act.
Teach me how, will you? how you moved on? I don't know how to. So please, teach me.
I wish there's a way I can invade your mind.